The Cold and the Beautiful

At my feet, fighting the chill, as he has been for a large part of the night.



I'm exhausted - AGAIN!!!
We've had another rough night round here at the Towers and Padfoot and I have hardly slept a wink.
I have been downstairs in the lounge with the boy all the time and sleep does not come easily to him these days, hence not to me either.
The latest problem is the biting winter cold. Pad has lost so much weight and his system is so weak having to battle the cancer in his chest all the time that he feels the chills terribly. Don't get me wrong, the Towers are as warm as toast - too warm for my liking. I was brought up by a clinically insane woman who insisted on having the windows in the house open all year round and she refused to put on the central heating because, and I quote, "it runs up the bills"!
By contrast, the heating is on full blast here all the time - God knows what the winter quarter bill is going to be - but Pad has to go out from time to time to chat to the birds and do what has to be done. The result is that when he comes back inside his teeth chatter uncontrollably and he shivers incessantly. It has been taking him a good hour to warm up and so I have taken to throwing a bedspread around him the moment he steps in from the cold. It warms him up a bit quicker but he then finds it difficult to get back to the Land of Nod. Invariably, no sooner has he started pushing out the Zs than the call of nature wakes him up again and he wants to go back outside and off we go again.
The latest on his condition is that the final biopsy results came through last Thursday and they confirmed that his spleen, stomach and liver are clear but the mass in his chest is malignant. It is making him cough quite a lot and he is still losing weight, although not as dramatically as before.

Pad is never alone - nurse Tilly in particular pops in to check on him constantly.


Sleep at last!!

He is still not in any pain (I CAN tell) although his quality of life is not brilliant - but it is more than bearable - and he is eating well. Sadly, he is also drinking a lot and that leads to the problems outlined above (when I return from work in the week, the first job is the hour-long clean up!!)
There is little that can be done for him but, as a last resort, the vet, the lovely Sally, has referred him up to the specialist veterinary hospital at Liverpool University and so he and I will take a trip up there on January 7. As Sally so quite rightly said, "they probably won't be able to do anything for him but you've got nothing to lose".
Anyway, in the meantime, the sleepless nights will no doubt continue and while I long for my bed I will be staying by his side from now on.
Nothing for Grantham - except, perhaps, the cold.