Great lines of the 21st Century - No. 2,349.
A pal of mine - let's just call him Pat, although his real name is.......is..........well............Pat, came across an acquaintance in the pub the other day.
Said acquaintance last hauled his fat, spotty, purulent arse out of bed to go to work when God's dog was a mere puppy. Since then, after a brief outing as a Coronation Day flag-seller, he has done FUCK ALL!! His P45 is, in fact, in the Victoria and Albert Museum!!
He is, however, kept in the higher rate tax bracket thanks to incapacity benefit (he suffers from chronic indolence), job-seekers allowance (he allows other people to look for work), child benefit (he has spawned more offspring than the average cod) and settee credits - all this, mind, without fear of bills for his rent, phone, clothes, bets, prostitutes, drugs or Tenants Extra ever being shoved through his letterbox to disturb his enjoyment of Trisha because, like the rest of his fucking outgoings, WE fucking pay them!
Where was I? Oh yes. So Pat sees this sloth at the bar and in a spirit of altruism says: "Can I get you a beer?"
What did our welfare system wonder reply? I kid you not, he said....................."No, let me get you one. You can't afford it, you're working."
I am a Socialist, but that is Socialist spelt S O C I A L I S T and not C U N T!
He can go to Grantham.
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3 comments:
Someone like this should have his benefits cut off completely.
Ideally with rusty cheesewire.
BGT
I believe that Harold Wilson claimed that the Labour Party owed more to Methodism than Marxism.
Funny how a million Poles can come here and walk into jobs while our work ethic bereft scroungers claim that they 'have a bit of a sore leg' and 'suufer from the stress'.
Isn't there some politico currently exhorting doctors to write 'wellness notes'? You know, 'To whom it may concern: No way is this fucker anything but bone bloody idle. He don't show up for work, DON'T PAY HIM. Sincerely, etc etc.'
Now this I gotta see.
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