I'm worried about the would-be martyrs of the True Russian Orthodox Church - I just don't think they've thought things through.
You may well have heard that members of this breakaway church have barricaded themselves inside a cave in Russia and are threatening to blow themselves up if the authorities don't let them wait there until next May when they claim the world is going to end.
What sort of a bargaining position is that for budding activists?
Troglodyte: "Back off, pigski!! Don't come any closer! We're all going to die in May and if you don't go away we'll kill ourselves."
Fuzzski: "Sorry? Run that by me again."
Troglodyte: "Uurm, yeah, ok. Uurm, right, right, I've got it now. If you, right, come in here, right, we'll all kill ourselves. Yeah, yeah, I think that's it."
Fuzzski: "...and if we don't come in?"
Troglodyte: "Uuuuurrmm, uuuurrmmm......hang on a bit.....uurrmmm....if you, right, don't come in, right....ok, ok, just supposing you don't come in, right.....let's just suppose, right....like, that you don't come in, right....we're....uuurrmm.....we're......we're all going to die."
Fuzzski: "See you in June."
Troglodyte: "Ok, bye for now. Take care."
Pity the recruitment manager for this dickhead sect. How on earth do you persuade people to sign on the dotted line when all you can offer them is death, either now or in May? Opportunities for promotion must surely be limited?
Also, not content with failing to see the idiocy of their position, the members seem completely unperturbed by the fact that the bloke who started the cult, Pyotr Kuznetsov, is not with them. That hardly inspires confidence, does it? Not only that, old Pyotr is currently undergoing psychiatric tests!! You would have thought that might have given his followers the slightest inkling that all was not well with the cause.
Sorry, the True Russian Orthodox Church can go to Grantham.
2 comments:
There is a lot of the worlds going to end stuff about at the moment. Its big in America according to somethnig I heard on Radio 4 recently. Alarmingly quite a lot of them had positions of power in the government.
Birdwatcher - i think the power drives 'em nutso.
In any case, if the end of the world doesn't get 'em, the cold of the ice cave will...
It's gonna be a long winter...
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