I am in love - there's the rub.
You see, every time in my life I have tip-toed down Love Lane it has always ended in tears. The reasons can be categorised thus:
1. The women I loved had staples in their navels and turned out not to be real (adolescent phase).
2. The targets of my affection didn't love me.
3. I met the targets of my affection on the internet and they turned out to be hairy dockers from Merseyside.
4. The targets of my affection were eventually worn down by my persistence but realised, after some years, that I was an arse and they turned lesbian/ran off to join the Foreign Legion/hid in the attic until I went away.
Well, my latest love interest is.................someone off the telly! Sounds as though there's a future in it, eh? She is Claudia Winkleman, daughter of the pneumatically breasted newspaper big cheese Eve Pollard.
Thing is, I don't think young Claudia is likey to be passing Pither Towers in the near future and I have, to date, received no letters or phone calls from her inviting me to ruin her for other men.
I therefore need help so here goes:
..............then again, I think I might just forget about her. Unrequited love can go to Grantham.
4.2
2.7
8
1.6
0
5.9
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2 comments:
You are the sexy boy related the one of Kismet fame or the writer of Tess or the one in the Nancy Drew stories please tell.
I am not related to any of the Muppets, nor have I written for Communist papers and I am not a nancy boy.
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