Give your chuckle muscles a rest and just ponder this for a moment. It's something else to file under "S" for "Shurely shome mishtake?"
I listened to two discussions today, one on the Devil's Lantern, the other on the wireless. The first featured some apologist for Saudi Arabia who kept banging on about how spiffing and friendly the country was, how it stood for all that was right in the world and how its near-perfection explained why the USA and Britain fell over themselves to buddy up to and protect this supposed island of sanity in a sea of Islamic lunacy.
The wireless chat featured some Yank who drawled on about how evil the Chinese were and how China posed a major threat to the West and so inter-continental missiles had to be aimed at it.
Now, maybe I've got this wrong, but isn't Saudi Arabia a focal point for Islamic fundamentalism and Moslem terrorists? Where is Osama bin Laden from? Whose vast wealth funds Al Quaida? Where are 50 per cent of all "insurgents" who have so far carried out violent attacks in Iraq from? Do you know a good Saudi Arabian take-away near you? Name one good Saudi Arabian pub.
On the other hand, how many attacks have the Chinese launched on the UK mainland of late? Name one violent, Buddhist fundamentalist. Which countries have the Chinese invaded of late. Who is the king of China?
Cast your minds back to when Bush first got elected/staged his coup.Do you remember, he started jumping up and down, claiming that the Chinese were intent on world domination and needed to be kept in check? He was just about to get the troops saddled up when deranged Islamists distracted his attention. Well, Bush has fucked up majorly in Iraq and desperately wants everyone to forget about it, the North Koreans won't have a fight and so it's back to the Chinese. Orwell wrote that the capitalist bosses have to have perpetual war to keep everyone occupied, afraid, subservient and making them money. There's a lot to be said for that argument but it has never really been put into practice before because the electorate has, until now, been too smart.
What then is the difference between Saudi Arabia and China? Why do the Bush/New Labour regimes hate the Chinese and want to start a Cold War with them but love the Saudis and fight to defend the king who is bleeding his populace dry at about the same rate as he is pocketing the billions from his country's main natural resource? Go on, take a wild guess!!
The future doesn't look good, does it? I mean, even if the boffins manage to make oil obsolete by developing effective alternative sources of power, what then? If wind power takes off then we'll all be toadying up to Eskimos. If solar power is the way forward then the Bedouins will be running the show. If hydropower is the answer then we'll all be going Dutch. There's no way out.
My head's hurting again so I'm going to have a lie down.
8 comments:
The Adulterer's Head in Daventry serves an excellent pint of Jihad Light Ale and can rustle up a bowl of sheep's eyes faster than you can say "non-elected absolutist monarchy".
Geothermal energy is the way to go. I've always fancied being a mole.
By the way, if you're after a good Saudi pub, you can get a cracking pint of Akhtar's Virginal 72 (0% alcohol v/v) at the Old Camel in Tipton. Alternatively, try the Glorious Selfless Martyrdom in Tividale (ask for a bag of the home-made scratchings) or the Death To The Infidels in Wednesbury. Their Jolly Prophet pale ale is pretty good if you like your beer really bitter. Don't go there on a Tuesday (Ladies' Night - nobody at all is allowed in) or Thursday (Weight Watchers).
BGT
Malc,
Ok, apart from the Adulterer's Head, Jihad Light and sheeps' eyes, what have the Saudis ever done for us?
BGT,
All right, all right, apart from the Adulterer's Head, Jihad Light, sheeps' eyes, Akhtar's Virginal, the Old Camel in Tipton, the Glorious Selfless Martyrdom in Tividale, the Death To The Infidels in Wednesbury and Jolly Prophet pale................
Damn, I got beaten to it.
If I'd know Malc was going down that road, I'd probably have ocncentrated on the Chinese instead. Bugger.
BGT
There is definitely a secret cabal of revolutionaries lurking in the Lucky Star Chinese restaurant on my high street. They look shifty and all have the same colour hair.
Anyway, that lurid pink sweet and sour sauce is radioactive and thus constitutes a weapon of mass destruction.
Deport the lot of them.
Garfer,
The trouble with the Chinese is, no sooner have you deported some you feel like deporting more five minutes later.
You raise pertinent and vital issues as usual Reg. If I could just stop being all excited because someone mentioned Tividale on the internetty .....
Arabella,
At the risk of pushing you to orgasm across the ocean.......Burnt Tree Island, Birmingham New Road, Coseley, Old Hill.
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