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Friday 13 April 2007

Cometh The Hour, Cometh The Flan Recipe



This is not, repeat NOT, a sexist rant (again) nor, I'm afraid, very amusing. It is just an honest, in-depth critique of something which is as British as toasted teacakes and mugging old ladies in the street......bloody Woman's Hour!
Woman's Hour is a Radio 4 institution (remember what Groucho Marx said about marriage as an institution?) which trumpets its raison d'etre as to "celebrate, inform and entertain women". What it in truth does, in my warped opinion, is to make Alan Partridge's "Fact of The Day" slot on Radio Norwich seem enthralling by comparison.
Are there seriously more than a handful of women out there who either listen to this bollocks or find it remotely relevant, let alone entertaining? No girlies of my acquaintance are hungry to learn "100 Things To Do With tapioca" (when there is, in fact, only ONE thing to do with tapioca - refuse to eat it!). I never hear them say "there was a fascinating item on Woman's Hour today about how vaginal yeast can be used to cultivate your own yogurt". Not once has my soon-to-be ex-wife regaled me over dinner with "the experiences of a woman's life as Ted Rogers' former school dinner lady". No, my STB would no doubt tune in to items on "things you have to tell your partner at 2 in the morning when you're bladdered" and "how to remove vomit stains from a pair of Evans Outsize dungarees" but the vagaries of "using trimmed pubic hair to knit a fashionable sweater" are just not her cup of ethanol.
My point is......isn't Woman's Hour just a tad anachronistic, not to mention sexist? Doesn't it belong to an age where all women were supposed to be, and invariably were, pinafored and at home, cooking, ironing and washing for their brood while hubby went out to be the bread-winner, a la Katy Boyle in those God-awful Bisto adverts of my youth? Women were supposed to be always on the lookout for new recipes to delight their families and as they were confined to the house all day they wanted to listen to trivia about other people's lives so as to be transported elsewhere via the radio. Men were too busy "bringing a living wage into the family" to listen to the wireless and so the programme was deliberately uni-gendered.

To that end, every episode is STILL punctuated with an appalling "short story" which is invariably some romantic fiction drivel or a tale about "a woman being a woman as opposed to a man in a man's world which is run by men and not by women". Oh perleeaase!
I'm sure there are women around who still live like Katy Boyle, but not bloody many and hardly enough to justify their own hour-long slot on a national radio channel every day.
No, for the rest of us, times have changed a bit. Everyone lucky enough to find a job is out working themselves into the ground. They come home in dribs and drabs, all knackered, they often eat at different times and then something quick so that they can then quaff some booze to blot out the tiredness while collapsing in front of the Devil's Lantern for a few hours before crawling up to bed to do it all again the next day. A bleak view, I know, but not that far off the mark for many.
As to Woman's Hour being sexist, well, IT IS!! There is no Man's Hour (thank fuck!). If there was, no doubt the boys and girls at Radio 4 would cram it with items on "how to tie trout flies", "pipe cleaning" and "choosing slippers with care".
The only value I can see in Woman's Hour is the unintentionally comedic. Take, for instance, the lead item on the programme's website today. It is an item about some bird musician and continues.......

"One of the world's most distinguished organists, Jennifer has been called an 'esteemed wizard of the organ'..."

Even I would have tuned in to hear that but, I fear, I would have been somewhat disappointed.
No, with apologies to the blue-rinse brigade in the Home Counties and the like, Woman's Hour can go to Grantham.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Alan's fact of the day: "Crabsticks don't actually contain any crab."

Love
Big Ears

WEDNESDAY, 21 NOVEMBER 2007

SHORTS DON'T MATTER! 1. From the greatest programme ever made about association football, Barnstoneworth United FC manager Mr Dainty delivers one of the finest English soliloqiues of all time.......and afterwards, spare a thought for the club steward's wife Vera (YOU ONLY HAVE TO WATCH HALF OF THE CLIP!!).

Monday, 12 November 2007

Not everyone who agonises over their life is a painter. Some of us agonise because we're NOT painters.

....And On the Subject of Great Public Services

I know most of you have heard this marvellous song by those doctors who are the Amateur Transplants......but I think the video is a nice addition. P.S. If there are kids in the room I'd shuffle them out before hitting play.

...There's More

On the subject of those great doctors, here is their version of More Than Words which presents their challenging views on women outside Watford. The very-soon-to-be ex-Mrs Pither, coming from Cumbria, is a huge fan. Again, get those kids out of the room!

Leave Britney Alone, Ok!!!

Oh...........my............God!!!!! My heartfelt thanks go to BGT for this. I won't say much more, I don't need to. Mr Loony of Loonytown, USA (I think it's a bloke, anyway), says it all. I fear he may be wound too tight for.....well.....well for everywhere, really!

Tuesday, 18 September 2007.

I wish I'd sung this! For non-Americans, and with apologies to all the smart arses out there who already knew, the FCC is the Federal Communications Commission and it monitors TV and radio output in the States - a sort of broadcast police - while the EPA is the Yanks' so-called Environmental Protection Agency, a body which does exactly the opposite of what it says on the can. (P.S. We went to the same school, you know? Eric and me, that is, not George, Martha, Dick and Condoleeza and me. I don't think they went to school.) P.P.S. Please see below if you are I Like The View, Malc or Doris.

To Make You Laugh and Cry

I was listening to this on a Sunday, the very-soon-to-be ex-Mrs Pither is a Catholic, Tom Lehrer is one of my all-time heroes and this is one of his best.............no other reasons. On a more sombre note (and with thanks to Fish for coming up with this Woman's-Own-passes-the-time-in-the-dentist's-waiting-room nonsense), why not get a computer to tell you that you are a waste of space and your life is a sham of a mockery of a farce? Ok, it's from one of those poxy dating sites but...go on, take the test. You ain't got much to beat!!
This Is My Life, Rated
Life: 4.2
Mind: 4.1
Body: 2.7
Spirit: 8
Friends/Family: 1.6
Love: 0
Finance: 5.9
Take the Rate My Life Quiz
Apparently, in my case, "computer say 'no!'"

I First Saw This When I Was Little - And Loved It! I Hope That Explains a Few Things

Fuck, Fuckety, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck

It has been pointed out to me that, particularly for one whose profession is supposedly literary, my language is getting worse. My use of the "F" word is, I am told, far too prevalent and hence loses impact. To those who share this view I suggest you watch the following:

Tony Blair Isn't a Burglar - But If He Was.........

In the spirit of Gustav Holst's Jupiter and Manfred Mann's Earth Band, I feel like raising a smile today. The Big Green Thing alerted me to this and, for no other reason than to raise a smile on an otherwise crap Wednesday, I think it has to be shared. Grantham shall not have him - when he gets out of prison.

Life On The Edge - No Net.

I was wrong when I feared it might be a dull weekend, what with my pals being away, my soon-to-be ex-wife in rehab and only the dogs to play with. How wrong can a man be? This much fun must surely be illegal? Just click to see the japes and hoots I am having! Click again to see how things got REALLy exciting! Tomorrow we're going to chase pigeons.

The Good Old U.S. of A. - Guardians of Freedom and Democracy. Nothing to Be Scared of, Then?

Be honest........

IT'S THE QUIZ OF THE WEEK! JUST SCROLL DOWN AND HIT "FULL QUIZ".