Carry On Britain

Hurrah!! We're safe! Our Brave Tone has, once again, beaten off the continental hordes and saved this sceptred isle from the horrors Johnny foreigner had in store for us.
Yes, Tone may have crayoned in his name on the new European Union treaty but, like John Major before him, he has stood firm and got an opt out on some pinko, Commie, lefty, namby-pamby, hoity-toity clauses those tree-hugging, reds-under-the-bed in Europe wanted us to sanction. Phew! Thank God for that! I mean, a human and social rights charter? Can you believe that? It only wanted to "outlaw torture, protect national minorities, combat racism, ensure equality between men and women and protect media freedoms", didn't it! It's just political correctness gone mad! What next? They'll be expecting the stinking electorate over here to actually have a vote themselves as to whether this kind of liberal rubbish should be adopted. Thankfully, politics in Britain has come a long way since the days when people actually had a say in what went on.
I mean, history has proved that if you give an inch to the Trotskyite scum which passes for the majority of the electorate in this country then they'll take a mile. Good God, they'll be saying next that the Government shouldn't try to stop them smoking in their own homes, drinking if they're pregnant or eating an egg for breakfast!!
We faced just as big a potential crisis in 1991 when we were being asked to sign up to a Charter of Workers' Rights, would you believe, as part of the Maastricht Treaty. Even though we had a less right wing Government at the time, John Major managed to stand up to the Eurocrats and say "NO!!!" Workers' rights!! Jesus Christ! RIGHTS FOR WORKERS!!!!!Robert Maxwell would turn in his watery grave (if he were dead......but that's for another time). We haven't spent the last 30 years eroding the rights of union members while at the same time giving employers carte blanche to bully and flog employees into the ground and then lay off thousands at a time when profits dip from £89 billion-a-year to £79,999,999,999,999 just for some wet frogs or hippy sausage-eaters to try to undo all that good work.
Workers/social rights, eh? You wouldn't catch your breath. In the 21st Century!!??!!No, thank God for Tone and thank God for New Labour. I'm just worried that things might still go sour if those ultra-left-wing Tories get in at the next election. Then again, nah! S'never gunna 'appen. Tomorrow belongs to New Labour!