"By jove, missus!! What a wonderful day!"

I manage to find most things in life funny. Indeed, some of the funniest things can arise out of seemingly sad incidents. Iraq, however, does not really make me laugh until I moisten my undergarments. Sorry, but Mr Chuckle has gone away for the day and Mr Serious has moved into the spare bedroom.
It took a bit of doing but Tony Blair and George W Bush have managed it. They have, admittedly indirectly, elevated an evil, mass murdering, psychotic tyrant to the widely accepted status of an heroic martyr. Far from wiping all trace of Saddam Hussain off the face of the earth, he is is now immortalised in places the Western world's Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber can never get at him again - the minds of millions around the world.
Blair, Thatcher's perma-grinned bastard child, and Bush, who gives village idiots a bad name and makes Ralph in the Simpsons look gifted, had already notched up a string of achievements over Iraq. They had told copious, abject lies to justify invading and ignored the wishes of the rest of the world, expressed through the United Nations, to show restraint and wait for evidence of weapons of mass destruction. We all suspected then and know now why they felt they had to crush once and for all the credibility of the UN - there WERE NO WMDs.
They then sent thousands of people over to wage THEIR war, the pair of them being about as courageous and up for the fight themselves as a chaffinch is good at playing the piano. True to their plankton-equivalent combined intelligence, neither had a clue what to do once Saddam was overthrown and it actually came as a fucking surprise to them that chaos and civil war ensued. More than 3,000 American and approaching 150 British servicemen and women have now died fighting this fuckwit conflict which, as predicted, has destabilised the entire Middle East and given Al Qaeda a rallying point and thousands of new recruits. The damage is done and will probably not be repaired for many, many years after the Western forces have left.
Surely Blair and Bush couldn't fuck things up any more? It wasn't possible, was it? Yes it was! There was a ridiculous show trial for Saddam. Was there ever any likelihood that he would be given a conditional discharge and four points on his licence, let alone being found not guilty? It also gave him a platform to address the rest of the moslem world and show himself as a victim of the Western oppressors. Why wasn't he just shot when he was found and the world then told he had died in a shootout? Job done. No Saddam, no martyrdom, no immortality. Oh, I forgot, Western governments don't have people killed or tell lies. Sorry.
The spermatazoic icing on the cock-up cake was the execution of Saddam. Forgetting for a moment that killing for peace is like fucking for virginity, Saddam stands there quietly, unafraid, showing strength, dignity and courage, while he is surrounded by a whooping bunch of pot-bellied yobs, all of them dressed in black, IRA-style balaclavas (too afraid or too ashamed to be identified), who taunt him and film the whole sordid episode on mobile phones. Forgive me, but wasn't S H supposed to be the sub-human, uncivilised, piece of scum in that little tableau?
I understand that the execution had to be filmed - to prove to doubting Iraqis that Saddam was indeed dead - but not like fucking that!
Blair and Bush can go to Grantham. Let's see how long it takes them to get Lincolnshire embroiled in a war with North Korea.